A common question when I was a kid was "What do you want to become when you grow up?" As a kid, I answered this question with... I don't remember. I am aware that this is a frequently asked question but my answer was, I guess, just a part of my past now. Other kids would answer that he/she wants to be a doctor, teacher or maybe a pilot. All with the same purpose, to help other people. Having those children answer this question straightforwardly made me envy them. Lucky are they for they know what they want to be. Unlike me, who is still uncertain about what future lies ahead of me.
I will be graduating, hopefully, this year with a bachelor's degree in Information Technology. Computers. The memory of how I ended up with this course was still fresh in my mind. I am a female online gamer when I was in high school. Ragnarok Online, O2Jam and Audition Dance Battle were the games I played back then. It cost me a lot of money, especially in Ragnarok load, and a life, the real one. My so-called life was in the virtual environment the computer introduced me. For me, Prontera is where I belong. Myself was the character I am controlling and Ragnarok is my world. But later I realized that there is somebody who created this world. I have no idea who and how he did it. The idea that it is inside a machine called a computer, it means that somebody placed the "world" there. I felt jealousy to my world's creator. I became greedy. I wanted to become the "creator" of that kind of world.
In the latter years of my high school, we're introduced to some information technology (IT) fundamentals. Never did the "creator" left my mind, as well as the desire to become someone like him. It was in our IT class I was introduced to where the world came from. Lucky am I when I was in my senior year, I learned that I could study to be the creator. "I could be the creator of a different world, a better world, a nirvana. Something far better than Ragnarok." Without other thoughts, just like the game, the character, and the ways of Ragnarok, I signed up for the training of becoming the creator.
For four years now I've been training to be the creator of a new world. My ideologies were never gone and I'm trying my best to pursue them all. I will be someone who will deliver a different kind of experience to others. But there's something wrong with what I am doing. The desire of creating a new world, it is given, but what kind of world. In my years of studying, I've encountered different ways of creating a world like Ragnarok. I've learned that it is through Programming but you could program it using different languages. It could also be placed in the computer or in a cloud. What the world looks like could be defined in many ways through media like Flash or Photoshop.
Along my journey, I learned that the world I am pertaining to is a program. The creator is called a programmer. I wanted to become a creator, thus the real meaning of what I said back then was, I wanted to become a programmer. That was the reason why for four years, I've been studying really hard in memorizing and understanding the different codes for different languages. I volunteered to program whenever there is a project. I thought hard whenever we had application examinations and got the highest grade.
I worked hard in becoming the creator. Guess what, I've reached my dream. I've become one without me knowing it. Since day one, I was the creator. I was the creator of small worlds. It can be justified that the worlds I created back then were not made for no reason. All my efforts and visualizations of what the world I will create is put into reality. I already created the world I've been dreaming of. I strongly believe that my creations are better than Ragnarok because everything I imagined what my world will be was there. Yes, it is different from Ragnarok in looks and functionalities. There are no monsters, swordsmen and cities in my world. But if there is one thing similar to Ragnarok and my creations, it is action.
Now, in a few months, I'll be finished with my training. The purpose why I entered this training was fulfilled. I wanted to become a creator of a world and it was bestowed upon me even I haven't completed this journey yet. I was left in a state of confusion. There were no more reasons left to continue. But this experience gave me something I didn't ask for: choices.
Everything I've learned in this journey was not all about fulfilling my dream to be a creator of the world. I realized that being the creator is only a step in the real dream. The time I felt that there were no reasons to continue, I knew that in this game, I am still a novice, like Ragnarok, waiting for the job I'll take after all these hardships. This game has many jobs called the programmer (the right term for the creator), network administrator, graphics artist and database administrator. There are advanced jobs as well to become a better and more skilled person than I was before. But given all these choices, what will I choose? I admit that I had other dreams in my mind rather than being a programmer but will I be as effective in that field as I am now?
Little did I know, I am still that someone I was back then. That female online gamer who lived in the world of the game she played. I thought I was already out of the box, that I've already left the game to be someone who creates the game. But, no; I am still in it. I am still a character and I still fight the monsters and level up. But this time, the game's not Ragnarok; it is the game of Choice.
I will be graduating, hopefully, this year with a bachelor's degree in Information Technology. Computers. The memory of how I ended up with this course was still fresh in my mind. I am a female online gamer when I was in high school. Ragnarok Online, O2Jam and Audition Dance Battle were the games I played back then. It cost me a lot of money, especially in Ragnarok load, and a life, the real one. My so-called life was in the virtual environment the computer introduced me. For me, Prontera is where I belong. Myself was the character I am controlling and Ragnarok is my world. But later I realized that there is somebody who created this world. I have no idea who and how he did it. The idea that it is inside a machine called a computer, it means that somebody placed the "world" there. I felt jealousy to my world's creator. I became greedy. I wanted to become the "creator" of that kind of world.
In the latter years of my high school, we're introduced to some information technology (IT) fundamentals. Never did the "creator" left my mind, as well as the desire to become someone like him. It was in our IT class I was introduced to where the world came from. Lucky am I when I was in my senior year, I learned that I could study to be the creator. "I could be the creator of a different world, a better world, a nirvana. Something far better than Ragnarok." Without other thoughts, just like the game, the character, and the ways of Ragnarok, I signed up for the training of becoming the creator.
For four years now I've been training to be the creator of a new world. My ideologies were never gone and I'm trying my best to pursue them all. I will be someone who will deliver a different kind of experience to others. But there's something wrong with what I am doing. The desire of creating a new world, it is given, but what kind of world. In my years of studying, I've encountered different ways of creating a world like Ragnarok. I've learned that it is through Programming but you could program it using different languages. It could also be placed in the computer or in a cloud. What the world looks like could be defined in many ways through media like Flash or Photoshop.
Along my journey, I learned that the world I am pertaining to is a program. The creator is called a programmer. I wanted to become a creator, thus the real meaning of what I said back then was, I wanted to become a programmer. That was the reason why for four years, I've been studying really hard in memorizing and understanding the different codes for different languages. I volunteered to program whenever there is a project. I thought hard whenever we had application examinations and got the highest grade.
I worked hard in becoming the creator. Guess what, I've reached my dream. I've become one without me knowing it. Since day one, I was the creator. I was the creator of small worlds. It can be justified that the worlds I created back then were not made for no reason. All my efforts and visualizations of what the world I will create is put into reality. I already created the world I've been dreaming of. I strongly believe that my creations are better than Ragnarok because everything I imagined what my world will be was there. Yes, it is different from Ragnarok in looks and functionalities. There are no monsters, swordsmen and cities in my world. But if there is one thing similar to Ragnarok and my creations, it is action.
Now, in a few months, I'll be finished with my training. The purpose why I entered this training was fulfilled. I wanted to become a creator of a world and it was bestowed upon me even I haven't completed this journey yet. I was left in a state of confusion. There were no more reasons left to continue. But this experience gave me something I didn't ask for: choices.
Everything I've learned in this journey was not all about fulfilling my dream to be a creator of the world. I realized that being the creator is only a step in the real dream. The time I felt that there were no reasons to continue, I knew that in this game, I am still a novice, like Ragnarok, waiting for the job I'll take after all these hardships. This game has many jobs called the programmer (the right term for the creator), network administrator, graphics artist and database administrator. There are advanced jobs as well to become a better and more skilled person than I was before. But given all these choices, what will I choose? I admit that I had other dreams in my mind rather than being a programmer but will I be as effective in that field as I am now?
Little did I know, I am still that someone I was back then. That female online gamer who lived in the world of the game she played. I thought I was already out of the box, that I've already left the game to be someone who creates the game. But, no; I am still in it. I am still a character and I still fight the monsters and level up. But this time, the game's not Ragnarok; it is the game of Choice.
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